Editor’s Pick
- Autoblow A.I.
- Best Blowjob Machine
- Sleeves can be interchanged
- Industrial strength motor
- Does NOT require batteries
- Hands free blowjob machine
- Sleeves are easy to clean
- Kiiroo Onyx+
- Best Blowjob Masturbator
- Vibrating Sex Toy
- USB rechargeable
- 100% Hands free
- Sliding scale of speed
- Easy to clean and store
- F1s Developer's Kit
- Best Blowjob Toy
- Hands Free
- No Batteries Needed
- Powerful Motor
- Body-Safe Silicone Sleeve
- Easy to clean
If you’re new to the wonderful world of sex toys you might be feeling overwhelmed by the variety of products available. We each enjoy different types of pleasure and I can’t be 100% certain as to which toy will best suit your personal needs and tastes. Still, I want to help you buy sex toys! What I can do is pass on knowledge that I’ve found helpful while shopping for sex products. I hope you consider the following 7 questions before making a sex toy purchase of your own.
What’s this toy or product made of and is it safe for my body?
Extensively researching how sex products are made may sound like a total buzz kill, but if you’re going to be fucking your or a partner’s orifices with these items you should know what they’re made of. A shocking amount of sex toys have been found to contain chemicals such as pthalates, phenol, and toluene that have been linked to reproductive and birth defects, changes in hormones, burns, irritation, cancer, and more. Unfortunately, sex toys are not regulated by the FDA unless they’re categorized by the manufacturer as “medical devices.” That leaves the majority of vibrators and pretty much all of the dildos, anal beads, plugs, cock rings, blowjob machines etc. without regulation. Manufacturers can claim their products are toxin-free or that they’re made of 100% medical grade materials, but don’t take their word for it. When it comes to sex products it is solely up to the consumer to make educated and safe purchases.
Don’t fret, my sweets! Sex toys are made from an array of body safe materials as well (e.g. ceramic, glass, aluminum, silicone, plastic, treated wood, etc.) and you won’t fall short of options, but please do your homework! Avoid toys made with PVC, rubber, or jelly and any toy that has a rubbery or chemical smell. Also, be careful of porous materials and extra squishy toys that are not from reputable vendors. These may or may not be safe for use at all or in the long run.
Is the manufacturer trustworthy and/or is the distributor reputable?
Going along with what was covered above, it’s important to know whether or not you can trust the folks making or selling you sex toys. Good news: there are manufacturers and retailers dedicated to the distribution of quality, body-safe sex products. These companies have passed the test of time and many offer generous warranties and guarantees with their products. All you have to do is find them. I won’t consider buying a sex toy from a new manufacturer without checking it first. It’s probably not a good idea to buy from a company that doesn’t disclose information about the product’s manufacturer or materials. However, even if they do, I’m going to reiterate that we can’t blindly trust a company’s claims to be true no matter their size or power. There have been instances where retailers backed by larger marketplaces (e.g. Ebay, Amazon) have been found to sell used, unsafe, and counterfeit products at a discount. Don’t do it! Be kind to your genitals!
Will it do what it’s supposed (I want it) to do?
What gets you off? What do you want to explore? What’s your budget? Aim to find a toy that will give you the type of stimulation you know (or think) you’d enjoy most. Start by reading the description and the specifications of some products that intrigue you and look for keywords (discrete, external, internal, waterproof, etc.) indicating that this particular toy might fulfill your needs. Be sure the toy is safe to use in the way you want to use it. For example, if you’re looking for a toy to try anally make sure it has a flared base or handle.
What I find most useful is reading reviews. Keeping in mind that what works for one may not work for you and vice versa, it can be extremely helpful to get a real person’s (not a salesperson or spokesperson) opinion on a product. There are so many informative, honest, entertaining, and adorable sex toy reviewers out there. A quick scan through some of their posts can give you a peek into their toy tastes (size, power, impact play, etc.) and sexual tendencies. Before you know it, you’ll have a team of veteran masturbators to advise you in your sex product investments all while being delightfully entertained with stories of dildo suction cups and nipple clamps or me choking on the lubricant from hell! That being said, remember that some reviewers receive compensation for their posts and not all of them are going to have the integrity a consumer might hope for.
How do I care for this product?
You can wash most toys with antibacterial soap and warm water and some can be put in the dishwasher. If you’re sharing toys with folks you’re not fluid bound with, use condoms or check if the toy can be boiled or cleaned with a diluted bleach solution. Be sure to do your research when pairing toys and barriers with lube. Natural oils will break down latex and shouldn’t be used with condoms or dams. Similarly, silicone lube may ruin your silicone toys. When in doubt opt for a safe water based lube. Also, be sure to check expiration dates on water-based lube, condoms, etc.
As I mentioned, most toys can be washed with soap and water, but not all toys are waterproof. Sex toys that are splash proof or water resistant may only be safe for shower use so double check that your toy is completely waterproof and submersible before taking it into the bathtub.
You may be about to invest a pretty wad of cash on a product that will hopefully give you and/or your partner(s) beautiful orgasms and pleasure for years to come. Learn how to take care of it in order to get your money’s worth. Maybe you’d rather spend a bit more for a toy that’s rechargeable rather than one that uses disposable batteries or one that’s waterproof rather than splash-proof, etc. Whatever you decide, I suggest you keep it charged, clean, and away from vengeful cats.
Is the manufacturer or distributor of this product a jerk and/or is the marketing douchey?
Personally, I don’t like making assholes rich/er. Ideally, all of my purchases would be made from progressive companies with business strategies focused on quality and integrity. I’m afraid that this isn’t often the case. Now, I understand that reliably safe sex toys that are just right for your body aren’t as easy to come by as we might wish. Some of us may be completely enamored with a type of product only made or sold by a few reputable (safe) companies. I also get that the companies making and distributing these products want to make a profit. I just wish they went about it in a less offensive way. Heavily gendered marketing annoys the shit out of me. Especially, if said gendered marketing feeds into cheesy stereotypes or ridiculous behavioral norms. Bigotry? Big no-no. Gimmicks? Ugh! Throw in a little shitty customer service and you’ve pretty much lost me forever. I know no company is perfect and that when dealing with a niche industry such as this, compromises will have to be made, but I still take the above into consideration when choosing a retailer or debating whether or not to buy/endorse a product. Unfortunately, some of the toys I love are made by a company that has recently gone in a questionable marketing direction and while I’m not saying I’ll throw out my favorite toy just yet, I’ve found myself exploring alternatives for future purchases.
Can I help support one of my favorite sex bloggers by purchasing a product through an affiliate link on their site?
Sex blogging is extremely rewarding, but it’s also time consuming and hard work. It generally takes many hours of brainstorming, research, and editing before a post is ready to be published and the process of reviewing sex toys isn’t always as enjoyable as some might assume (sometimes things get stuck in our orifices). In addition to all of these shenanigans, most bloggers make themselves readily available to their readers via e-mail, twitter, the comment section of their blog, etc. for addressing questions and concerns.
I like to show my appreciation to my favorite sex bloggers by making purchases through the affiliate links on their websites. What better way to show appreciation for a person that is providing you with a service than by compensating them? There may even be coupon codes available for gifts or discounts on their site! Of course, if you’re purchasing from a brick and mortar shop you can still show support for sex toy reviewers by following, liking, subscribing, sharing, and commenting via social media platforms.
